Men experience loneliness is a different way
I know it feels like you've got to shoulder everything alone, and it can be tough hearing messages about how being a man means being strong, keeping emotions in check, and always providing.
People might say it’s easy, but I get that it's really not. You're expected to be the rock, the unshakeable one, but hey, you're human, just like everyone else.
We all have our battles, and despite some differences, at the core, our psychological needs—like love, understanding, and connection—are universal. No one is built to handle everything alone, not really.
It's pretty alarming, but also telling, that men are three times more likely to die by suicide compared to women. And did you know that a lot of guys out there feel incredibly lonely?
Many often don’t talk about it, either because they think they shouldn’t, or because they don’t have someone they can open up to.
Now I am going to teach you how to beat loneliness like a man - But what does that mean?
Understanding Loneliness: It's Not Just About Being Alone
Loneliness isn't just about not having many people around you. You can feel lonely even if you're constantly surrounded by others—it's a feeling, and often a negative one. Some people live alone and never feel lonely at all.
The next time you're feeling really great, think back to a moment when you felt alone. You'll likely see it differently when you're in a good mood. So, the issue isn't necessarily the number of friends you have. It's more about how you're feeling inside. If you were truly happy, it wouldn't matter whether you were alone or with others.
Instead of focusing on increasing your circle of friends, concentrate on managing your own well-being. Improving how you feel about yourself can make a bigger difference than simply adding more social contacts.
How Often Do You Feel Lonely?
Rarely or never
Occasionally, a few times a month
Often, a few times a week
Almost every day
The Superpower of Enjoying Your Own Company
Before we dive into the seven ways men can overcome loneliness, you need to understand that if you master being alone without feeling lonely you have a super power.
People often do extreme things to avoid feeling lonely, such as:
Always being on social media - Some stay online all day to feel connected to others.
Filling up their schedule - Others keep themselves busy all the time, so they don’t have to be alone.
Sticking in bad relationships - Many people stay with someone who isn’t good for them just to avoid being alone.
Now, imagine if you were happy on your own but could also enjoy time with friends when you want to. Your happiness wouldn't rely on others. You’d be comfortable by yourself because you like it, not because you have to. This ability to be happy with or without people around is a real superpower.
1. Get Active with Sports and Fitness
You need to get physically active every single day. No matter what you do, you need a minimum of 1-2 hours of exercise a day. There is absolutely no compromise on not being physically active for your well-being. Studies, like one from the American Journal of Psychiatry, have found that being active can lower signs of depression and anxiety by up to 30%. Why not join a gym, a local sports team, or a fitness group? This way, you get to keep fit and at the same time, meet new people who like the same things you do.
Improves Cardiovascular Health: Reduces risk of heart disease.
Boosts Mental Health: Releases endorphins that decrease symptoms of depression and anxiety.
Enhances Strength and Muscle Tone: Builds muscle mass and strength.
Increases Energy Levels: Boosts stamina and reduces fatigue.
Promotes Better Sleep: Improves sleep quality.
Improves Libido: Enhances sexual performance and desire.
Helps Weight Management: Aids in fat and calorie burning.
Reduces Risk of Chronic Diseases: Lowers the likelihood of conditions like type 2 diabetes and some cancers.
Improves Bone Density: Strengthens bones through weight-bearing exercises.
Boosts Brain Health: Enhances cognitive functions and delays mental decline.
Improves Self-Confidence: Increases self-esteem and body image.
Strengthens Social Connections: Encourages new friendships through group sports or fitness classes.
Now are you thinking I don't have the discipline or stamina to exercise?
Listen to this:
Now physical exercises is one thing; it will be your base. Now let's go to the next step.
2. How Eating Healthy Helps You Feel Happier and Less Lonely
Why Food Affects Your Mood
Research shows that eating lots of sugar and fat can make you feel sad and depressed. On the other hand, eating lots of vegetables, fruits, whole grains, and fish can help make you feel better and less anxious. So it is not important to eat healthy it is absolutely essential.
The Gut-Brain Connection
Most of the serotonin, a chemical that makes you feel happy, is made in your gut. So, a healthy diet helps your gut produce more serotonin, which makes you feel happier. A 2016 research study published in the Journal of Psychiatric Research demonstrated that probiotics, which improve gut health, could reduce anxiety levels.
Best Foods for a Good Mood
To feel better and less lonely, try to eat more:
Omega-3 Fatty Acids: These are in fish like salmon and sardines and can help reduce depression.
Whole Grains: They release energy slowly, keeping your mood steady all day.
Leafy Greens: Spinach and kale have folate, which helps fight depression.
Probiotics: Found in yogurt and fermented foods, these are good for your gut and mood.
Food is not just food, it is your fuel. If you want to perform your best and live a great life, you need to get the right fuel otherwise your engines will wear out. Eating these foods can make you physically healthier and emotionally happier, helping you feel more connected and less lonely.
3. Have a Mission
How do you imagine your life? Are you stressed or anxious because you don't know how you want your life to be? Well, I can understand that some people just need to try more things to know what they like, and life is for that - to experience new things and to find what you truly love, right?
But I can tell you what all men want and seek. We all want a loving family, to be wealthy (or not poor), to have great friends and experiences. So, start with that?
Ask yourself these questions:
Would I like to date a beautiful 10 out of 10 girl, go travel with her around the world?
Would I like to receive recognition for the job I am doing and be seen as successful?
Would I like to live in a nice apartment or house?
If you answer yes to any of these questions, you need to think about how you can reach those goals, which might be different for everyone. You might already have some money but are shy talking to girls.
Then get a dating coach, get uncomfortable, and go to the streets and start talking to strange girls. However, no matter what you do, you need to have a mission and vision of how you want your life to be and you need to work towards it.
4. Practice Yoga and Mindfulness
This will give you the foundation and stability you need to make the changes you need to do, and successfully change your habits. You should also definitely start with Hatha Yoga, it will give your body and mind more energy and balance you in ways you couldn't imagine.
Research in JAMA Internal Medicine shows that these practices can really help lower feelings of loneliness and stress. They teach you to live in the moment, which can change how you feel inside.
Here’s how you can start practicing mindfulness:
Focus on Breathing: Sit quietly and just pay attention to your breathing. Notice the air going in and out. If your mind starts to wander, gently bring it back to your breath.
Body Scan Meditation: Sit or lie down comfortably and slowly focus on each part of your body, starting from your toes and moving up to your head. Notice any feelings like pain or tension and breathe into them.
Mindful Observations: Pick something in nature and watch it carefully for a few minutes. Look at its color, shape, and texture.
Doing these mindfulness exercises every day can help you feel less lonely and more emotionally balanced. Being aware of the present moment helps you feel more connected to the world around you.
If you are up to a challange register for a 10 Days silent retreat. It is called Vipassana retreat and ahs the power to completly change your life.
5. Built your perfect Routine and withstand anything
Having a daily routine can really help your mental health and lower stress. Not only that, but to become successful or change in any meaningful way, it will take its time, and you need to have the required balance for that; otherwise, you will quit too early. The Lancet Psychiatry shows that regular sleep patterns lead to better mood and mental health. A routine keeps your body clock steady, which helps control your mood and stress.
Here’s how to build a good routine:
Set Regular Sleep Times: Go to bed and wake up at the same time every day to keep your sleep pattern stable and improve your mood.
Plan Social Interactions: Make time to connect with friends or family, like having a weekly dinner or a quick call.
Include Self-Care: Do things that make you feel good, like reading, taking a walk, or practicing yoga.
By keeping a routine with regular sleep, social time, and self-care, you can create a balanced life that supports your mental health and reduces loneliness.
6. Plan Social Activities to Combat Loneliness
You are not a lone wolf, nor are you not human. We are social beings, and we all need to interact with other humans; however, this does not mean that you must be around people all the time. Some individuals prefer to meet for coffee once a week, while others want daily contact; it all depends on you.
If you are lonely, I would not propose that you stop seeing people until you conquer this feeling - it is a process that takes time, and until then, try to schedule as many social engagements as you need.
And if you don't have any friends, nowadays there a tone of Online events you can join - For FREE.
Organizing regular social activities is a great way to boost your mental health. Research from the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships shows that spending time with others regularly can improve your mental well-being and make you feel more supported.
Here are some ideas for regular social activities:
Weekly Gatherings
Volunteer
Join a Gym with classes
7. Connect with the world around you and you won't feel lonely ever again.
Feeling lonely doesn’t mean you don’t have friends, it means you don’t feel connected. But we are all connected to the world around us, even if we don’t always see it. That is the awearness that you need to brin into your life to never feel alone again.
Here are five examples that we are connected:
Nature: The air you breathe out is what trees breathe in, and they give you the air you breathe in return.
Food: The fruits and vegetables you eat come from the ground and are grown by the earth.
Animals: Pets and wild animals can make you feel like you belong to nature.
Water: The water you drink comes from rivers, oceans, and the sky.
Seasons: The changing seasons affect how we feel and what we do.
To feel more connected, try these simple things:
Walk in Nature: Go to a forest or park. Look at the trees and think about how you share the air with them.
Mindful Eating: When you eat fruits or vegetables, think about how they were grown and where they came from.
Watch Animals: Look at birds, squirrels, or your pets. Notice how they live and move.
Appreciate Water: When you drink water, think about where it comes from and how it keeps you healthy.
Notice the Seasons: Pay attention to how each season changes the world around you and how you change with it.
By noticing these connections, you can feel less lonely and more part of the world around you.
Quiz: Why Am I So Lonely?
Conclusion
Feeling like you have to handle everything alone can be tough, especially when society tells men to always be strong and hide their emotions. But remember, you're human, and everyone needs love, understanding, and connection. No one should handle everything alone.
Men are three times more likely to die by suicide than women, and many men feel very lonely. Often, they don't talk about it because they think they shouldn't or don't have someone to talk to. But you can overcome loneliness by taking steps and connecting with your community.
Loneliness isn’t just about having fewer friends. You can feel lonely even when surrounded by people if you don’t feel connected. It’s more about how you feel inside. If you’re truly happy, it wouldn’t matter if you were alone or with others. Focus on improving how you feel about yourself rather than just trying to make more friends.
The ability to enjoy your own company is a real superpower. When you’re happy on your own, you can enjoy time with friends without needing them for your happiness.
Get active with sports and fitness. Daily physical activity is essential for your well-being. Studies show that exercise can lower signs of depression and anxiety by up to 30%. Join a gym, a local sports team, or a fitness group to stay fit and meet new people.
Eating healthy is also crucial. Avoid foods high in sugar and fat, and eat more vegetables, fruits, whole grains, and fish. This can improve your mood and mental health.
Set goals and work towards them to give your life purpose. Build a daily routine to help manage stress and keep your mental health in check. Practice mindfulness and meditation to reduce stress and feel more present. And don’t forget to plan regular social activities to stay connected and supported.
By taking these steps and engaging with your community, you can overcome loneliness and build a happier, more connected life. Remember, you’re not alone, and with effort, you can find the connections and support you need.
FAQ: Overcoming Loneliness and Building Connections
What are some quick ways to feel less lonely?
Get active with sports and fitness, join online communities, or volunteer your time. These activities help you meet new people and build connections.
Can exercise really help with loneliness?
Yes, studies show that regular exercise can reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety by up to 30%, making you feel less lonely and more connected.
How does eating healthy affect my mood?
Eating healthy foods like vegetables, fruits, whole grains, and fish can boost your mood and improve your mental health. These foods help your gut produce serotonin, which makes you feel happier.
What should I do if I don’t have any friends?
Consider joining online events or local clubs, volunteering, or taking classes. These activities provide opportunities to meet new people and build friendships.
How can I start practicing mindfulness?
You can start with simple exercises like focusing on your breathing, doing body scan meditation, or observing nature. These practices help you stay present and reduce feelings of loneliness.
Why is having a routine important for mental health?
A daily routine helps regulate your sleep patterns, reduces stress, and gives structure to your day. This can improve your mood and overall mental health.
Is it okay to spend time alone?
Yes, it’s perfectly okay to spend time alone. Learning to enjoy your own company is a powerful skill that can make you feel more content and less dependent on others for your happiness.
How can I connect more with the world around me?
Spend time in nature, practice mindful eating, observe animals, appreciate water, and notice the changing seasons. These activities help you feel more connected to the world.
What if I don’t feel comfortable talking about my feelings?
It’s important to find someone you trust to talk to. If that feels too hard, consider writing your feelings down or joining a support group where you can share in a safe environment.